Popo: A fine little fire-cracker of a movie, that was; see what happens when you follow good ol’ Popo on a treasure hunt?
Partijama: Oh, it was a very energetic film, Razz, not to mention how much fun it was digging through the archives. We really must do it more often.
Popo: And so we shall, by golly, if this exquisite bard has anything to say about it.
Lazlo: Exquisite? Pfft. There are still just the three of us here aren’t there?
Popo: Ah, you little kidder. Hey, didn’t I say that Alex Gainer was a fighter the moment he appeared onscreen? I called it, right?
Partijama: You did, Razz.
Lazlo: Any ninny could’ve guessed that.
Popo: Ahh, (beaming with pride) but it was this ninny who did (points at self, nods with vigour).
Lazlo (shakes head with disbelief): You never cease to amaze.
Popo: Yep, as soon as I saw that mild-mannered kindergarten teacher, I said…uh…I said, “Lazzie ol’ boy…”
Lazlo: Lord Lazlo!
Popo: Hmmm (lips pursed, thoughtful frown, tapping chin), nope, no sirree, definitely did not say “Lord Lazlo,” it was Lazzie all right-
Lazlo: (fists clenched) Why you ignorant, inexcusable-
Partijama: That was quite a predicament Alex found himself in quite suddenly, wasn’t it?
Popo: Oh man, was it ever.
Lazlo: Should’ve practiced a bit more situational awareness then, shouldn’t he? Being taken hostage like that, and then kidnapped by those military fiends…a hostage twice over. It would never happen to a Lord of Laqua.
Popo: And that’s precisely why you’ll not be appearing in any of these remarkable Bombastykan features any time soon. I on the other hand can be kidnapped dozens of times over, in the same spot, in the same manner, by the same villain. (Leaps, twiddles legs, laughing) I’m the perfect candidate, my future in Hollywood is pretty much guaranteed. Digest that, Lord of Laqua.
Lazlo: You hopeless imbecile.
Popo: Sticks and stones, Lazzie ol’ chap, sticks and stones.
Lazlo: Oh what I wouldn’t do for a few big ones right now. (Throws hands to the sky) One…just one…Partijama, surely-
Partijama (chuckling): Oh, come now, Lord Lazlo, surely it would be more fun to discuss this quite entertaining movie.
Lazlo: If you shared my mind even a little you wouldn’t need to ask such a question. (Waves hand) Oh, go on then…talk. (Folds arms sternly and scowls at Popo who is working his favourite yo-yo)
Partijama: You know, I was so curious to see what those underhanded people were injecting into their human test subjects to stoke their rage; in the end it turned out to be rather surprising, though not for the reasons I’d anticipated.
Lazlo: Ben…Benzebub, and…and hydrocacklelic…
Partijama: So sorry, (giggling) Benzene and Hydrochloric acid; the first, flammable and toxic, on par with Nastyn; the second, quite caustic, sort of like Barfalush.
Lazlo: No wonder the poor lout was so irritable; with hydrocroco…lic acid in your veins, who wouldn’t be?
Popo: I have a newfound respect for Alex Gainer. Any normal Bombastykan would surely have turned to mush.
Partijama: That probably wouldn’t have made for a good movie.
Popo: Hmm, you’re probably right; though with a little re-writing…
Partijama: And then he’d have a lot of trouble executing those wonderful martial arts moves.
Popo: Good point, buddy! Oh boy, that would’ve been a real loss to not see Alex in action. The way he laid into his enemies was pure awesomeness.
Lazlo: I liked the part when he flew through the air with his blaster and (hands like a gun, shaking) dududududu…
Popo: That was sweet. There was no lack of blasting that’s for sure.
Lazlo: The villains paid for their folly…with interest.
Partijama: And provided a slew of heart-pounding scenes in the process.
Popo: Ahhh, I know you’re talking about that helichopper scene, aren’t you, buddy?
Partijama: Hehehehe…helicopter, Razz.
Popo: Aha, thought it felt it a bit dubious coming off the lips. Well, at least I was closer than mister hydrocrackickle over there.
Lazlo: Why you insolent-
Partijama: I know you enjoyed that helicopter scene as well, didn’t you, Lord Lazlo?
Lazlo: Hmph, it was passable. I’ve seen better. (Face brightens, giggles) I couldn’t believe when Alex leapt over the side of that building and had to hang on by the finger-tips from a ledge.
Popo: I couldn’t believe the number of times he had to repeat that ledge-hanging manoeuver…
Partijama: And with that mean man shooting at him, or rather, around him.
Lazlo: Hehehe, that was funny, the way the villain was trying to get him to fall; well, funny in a serious sort of way…hehehe…
Popo: What was funny was when Alex and that bad guy were hanging from the heli-thingy for dear life, and the pilot wouldn’t even go to any of the roof-tops nearby; as if he was hoping they’d both fall and go splat.
Partijama: I thought that was quite inconsiderate.
Popo: Well, whatever it was, it worked on one of them. Nearly worked on both.
Partijama: That was some fall Alex survived; my word, he must’ve been some sort of bionic human.
Lazlo: “Glass broke his fall” they said. HA! I wouldn’t buy that if-
Popo: If they said I had to pay in ice-cream – chocolate, caramel, strawberry, with swirls of-
Lazlo: You bumbling fool…what you’re saying makes no sense!
Popo: Sense? I’ll tell what makes no sense – why didn’t they lure Alex with broccoli and peanut-butter? I’ve been wondering that for the last-
Lazlo: I give you credit just for wondering with the tiny glob rolling around in that so-called head of yours that’s supposed to be a brain.
Popo: That reminds me of the way Harry the reporter’s colleagues were treating him, as though he was some sort of moron.
Lazlo (snide grin): An excellent parallel, Popo.
Popo: Aww, thank you, buddy.
Lazlo: That reminds me of that scene where the little boy who lived next door to Alex was talking on the communicator…
Lazlo: And then he passed it to Alex, and the bad guys listening in and trying to track him, couldn’t figure out that he must have been right next door.
Popo (wiping eyes): Oh, that was just too good. I laughed a pop-corn through my nostril at that point.
Lazlo (look of distaste): Yes, I recall.
Popo (snickering): Sorry about that, didn’t sting your wrist too much I trust.
Lazlo: Oh, trust me, Popo, when I say that one of these days-
Partijama: Um, someone got their comeuppance in the end, didn’t he?
Popo: Griggs! Couldn’t happen to a nicer fellow. That’s what you get for messing with a Bombastykan filled with acid and all that other goop.
Partijama: That scene was so tense, it looked for all the world that Alex had met his end.
Lazlo: And then that officer stepped in and nailed the baddie…that was funny.
Partijama: So unexpected.
Popo: Oy, Lazlo, you wanna see funny? Look at this…(crosses eyes, sticks out tongue, shakes head)…hahaa, wasn’t that…oyy!! (Leaps from chair, sprints around the suite with Lazlo in pursuit on his glider)
Lazlo: (Firing electric bolts onto Popo’s rear end from above) How’s this for funny, eh? And that…and that…
Popo (leaping, shrieking): P-Partijama, administer the…yeow!…antidote, I think they got Lazlo with that…(leaps) ohohoo…hydroclavicackle stuff!
Partijama: According to my sensors, he seems to be in excellent health, Razz. I think I’ll observe him for a bit longer. In the meantime, I’d suggest running in a more erratic pattern…hehehehehe.